June 6, 2011

It happened again…

…a couple days of not eating well, then yesterday it seemed the cycle started again: the vomiting and all-night cough.
We’ve been celebrating a two-pound weight gain, better coloring and a much improved appetite when we hit another speed bump. I thought her appetite was going downhill for a few days, but I was hoping it was timing, the food, my choices or presentation, but I also felt this might be the fact that we’d started scaling back her meds over the last 2 weeks.

Then yesterday I was just celebrating a mealtime success, the tofu and quinoa w/ tomatoes that I’d carefully cooked, didn’t stay down. Last night I heard her cough a few times after she went to sleep and then I heard that familiar cough all night. It happened a few times an hour. I’d hear it and although it’s not terribly loud or rattle-y, it’s too familiar and worrisome and brings back this prickly feeling of half-asleep-maternal-panic and I think “oh no, be quiet, not again, I’m not getting up, and please don’t throw up”.

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